social media sympathy

Whenever a tragedy occurs, I suddenly feel like I'm not allowed to post anything (on Twitter, FB, Instagram, blog, etc.) because what does it matter what the weather is like where I am or what awkward/funny incident happened on my way over to X building or how I feel about a comment Y said in class or some random thing I overheard when people somewhere else in the world have suffered immensely? It doesn't. It really doesn't at all.

So I keep quiet, partly out of respect&reflection, but also partly because I feel guilted into it. You know, the whole "don't leave food on your plate because there are starving children in Africa" kind of guilt-tripping. 

But whenever a tragedy occurs, so many people I know (and don't know) post trending hashtags (like #prayforZ) or short little statements about how their hearts are breaking or how they can't believe such-and-such happened or how we all need to pray/keep victims in our thoughts&hearts, and I guess that's definitely the upside of this whole community aspect of the online "community" facilitated by social media — the encouragement, the solidarity, the public display of sympathy/empathy so that everyone remembers that the human experience is sometimes about taking on shared grief — but I'm not sure that this kind of response is always better than my self-conscious silence. 

Tragedies happen every single day, every single second — the unjust go unpunished, the helpless are overcome by more powerful natural and human forces, the hatred and bitterness and brokenness of people stifle attempts to love and heal — but there aren't daily hashtags for these events reminding people to pray or even donate 5 minutes of our thoughts. Yes, I completely understand that some events just hit much much much closer to home, and if we had to keep track of every single injustice and hurt and disaster in this world every single day, I think we would be overwhelmed and perhaps even desensitized. 

But I guess what it is that I want to say is not that social media should not be used to encourage and support those who are hurting — it should because it should be used for greater purposes than re-posting funny cat videos or #firstworldproblem statuses about having to wait too long in line at Starbucks or the air conditioning being too cold — but if it's just a fad, if it's because it makes you look like a caring, compassionate, socially-conscious person for that day, then I think it's better not to comment in such a public space. Whether we declare it to the world or not, a tragedy will take root in our thoughts and hearts and prayers if we truly care. We will not be able to keep ourselves from privately asking God (whether one believes or not) as we walk from point A to point B or as we lie in our beds at night staring at the ceiling: "Why?" and "Where is the good in this world?" and "How can we make this world a better place?" And though we will often forget as time passes, we will also remember from time to time as well. That's for us to know and feel and internalize. No one else has to know. But when it comes time to share, face to face — where we can see the tears gather in each other's eyes and hear the halting voice that carefully emerges from a broken heart — then we will share.