where'd i go?

I've been so MIA from my blog (which is so uncharacteristic of me) so I've come back, with nothing too insightful or interesting to say except...

I was journaling (for the first time in a long time) yesterday night instead of studying for my stat midterm this Thursday (so I guess I'm not that screwed yet), and after I finished writing like crazy, I realized three very important things:

1. I am SO incredibly different from the girl I was at the beginning of summer because God gave me exactly what I asked for. I can't write it word-for-word, as I don't have my journal with me right now, but I'm pretty sure I wrote something along the lines of, "I really want to grow this summer." Now, when I wrote that, I don't think I knew what I was asking for at ALL, but nevertheless, God proved faithful (and a little bit cheeky, I have to say) and gave me an incredibly transforming summer. Sure, freshman year in itself was a huge time of change for me as well, but I definitely think summer sealed the deal. I don't think I can really explain how or why without having you re-live everything in my own head or, at the very least, having you read my journal (which, alas, is not an option), but every time I realize how far I've come since May 24 until today...it's just kind of crazy.

2. God's planning is remarkable. When I'm living in the moment and jotting down these thoughts and feelings, it's hard to step back and see how they fit into the grand scheme of things, this novel God is writing about my life. But after letting some time pass and revisiting the story of my life and trying to see it through His eyes, it's so remarkable how God makes all these seemingly random puzzle pieces fit together. God really is the perfect planner (Jeremiah 29:11), and Jesus really is the author and perfecter of our faith (Hebrews 12:2).

3. I am so. in. love.* It's kind of scary and relieving and amazing all at once.

This is why journaling is so awesome. When you take the time to not only let go of everything onto paper and really give yourself time to think about what's in the now - but also when you step back and look at how it all fits into God's storyline for you...it's a crazy fantabulous reminder of how God works in our lives on a day-to-day basis, not just those WHOA breakthrough moments at retreat when you're sobbing your eyeballs out.

I think I write this like EVERY time I write anything on here, but God. is. SO. SO. SO. SO. SO. AWESOME!




*Who's the lucky (or unlucky?) man, you say? Well, before you read into that statement too much, I mean with Him. (< capital H). :) HAha, gotcha.